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Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.
Matthew 11:28 (ESV)

I wore my wedding dress at my funeral.

It wasn’t my choice. Nor was it my choice to repeat my wedding vows next to the corpse of my husband, also dressed in his wedding attire. And as if that were not enough indignity, my inlaws proceded to ceremoniously pluck the petals from my jasmine bouquet and crush the glass bangles on my wrists.

This was how Sree, my widowed friend who lives twelve time-zones away from me, described her entry into widowhood eight years ago.

This is how Sree lives now: her boys are all launched successfully into the world, each of them strong and sure of their faith. Two of the sons study under scholarship at international universities. The oldest finished university, also through scholarship, and is currently serving the Lord through an international mission group. Sree enjoys teaching at a local school.

Today I bring you the first in a three-part series which will offer you a peek at just how difficult her life as a Christian widow in a non-Christian world was. Take comfort as you read this knowing that Sree rose above her circumstances with the help of her Savior. This post will take you into the valley in which Sree found herself eight years ago when she lost her husband.

The price of belief in her country

In a country where the two predominant religions are Islam and Hinduism, Sree is one of the 5% of believing Christians. Her religious choice leaves her family’s cost of living 25% higher than registered Muslims who are given subsidies for purchases. For Sree and her boys, this law is a blessing because it grants her the freedom to practice her faith.

How Hindu widows are viewed in some countries

Freedom does not come without oppression. The religion of her late husband’s family, Hinduism, continues to hold widows as outcasts of society. One Hindu tradition considers a widow still bound to her deceased husband. In some regions, keeping a widow in your household can be considered bad luck. Many men will not speak to a widow, for fear of dishonoring her deceased husband.

The humiliation from her family began at the funeral.

Her in-law family dressed both Sree and her husband’s body in their wedding attire and repeated the entire wedding ceremony. Then in a statement of grief, they crushed the glass bangles on Sree’s wrist and plucked the petals from her jasmine bouquet. “The only thing they didn’t do was put me in the coffin with him,” she said. “My spirit was already dead!”

Once the funeral was over and her husband body cremated, her boys obligated to ceremonially wade out in frigid waters to disperse his ashes. “I wasn’t allowed to follow them,” she said. “Can you imagine, young kids doing this to their loving father’s ashes? It was so painful for me. My sister-in-law just mocked me by saying, ‘even a one-year-old kid can lose a father!’”

Stay tuned for what happens next. It will astound you.

Stay tuned next month for Part 2 of Sree’s story. If you feel your life as a widow is difficult, you will want to be encouraged by a woman who has been through the worst and, through the Grace of our Lord Jesus Christ, found purpose and fulfillment. After all, Christ tells us to come to Him, all that are heavy-laden, because He gives you rest. (Matt 11-18, ESV).

Meanwhile, consider praying for widows all over the world.

I ask You, Father, to give Your Word to widows around the world. For the widows without children in their care, give them Your peace and show them where they fit in Your plan. Show them how valuable they are to the kingdom. For the widowed mothers across the nations, please comfort them and help them trust You, that You will give them enough to complete the purpose You have given to them to raise their children in Your name. Give them vocations, strength, and wisdom in their choices. Help them keep the vision for their children as future young men and women who will lead the world in Your name. Amen.