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For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.
Philippians 2:13 (NLT)

After my husband died, I had well-meaning people ask me, “So what’s next?” — gentle way of encouraging me to use this shift in my life to “reinvent” myself. Something in me pushed back a bit against that, and looking back, I know that was the Lord.

They meant well. They were hoping to get me moving towards a sense of purpose and something exciting to look forward to, instead of dwelling on my grief.

But I remember thinking, I just had half of me ripped away, now I’m supposed to just replace that half with some purpose that I have no way of knowing what that is?

The world says look inside to find your passion. Scripture points us somewhere entirely different.

Paul reminds us,

For God is working in you, giving you the desire and the power to do what pleases him.
Philippians 2:13 (NLT)

In other words, purpose doesn’t begin with me asking, What do I want to do? It asks, Lord, what are You doing in me today?

God rarely reveals our purpose all at once. He unfolds it one faithful step at a time.

When we’re grieving, it’s tempting to imagine one giant purpose out there somewhere, waiting to fall from the sky and fill that hole in our hearts. If we can only discover it!

But what if God’s next purpose starts right where you are?

For me, it started at home. I had four young children who still needed a mother. Some days it felt overwhelming just to make it through the day. There were moments when I’d quietly slip into another room for a good cry before gathering myself enough to return to them.

As I slowly learned to shift my attention from my own pain to the children, I sensed Him gently saying, “Yes, my daughter. This.”

I wasn’t discovering a grand new calling. I was simply being faithful where He had already placed me.

Later, I began seeing purpose in the ordinary places outside my home. How was I treating the waitress, the cashier, the neighbor?

Grief doesn’t disappear overnight, but carrying out the Lord’s purpose daily gives me Hope.

I couldn’t stay mired in prolonged grief for too long when I shifted my thinking to a continual ask: Lord, how do You want me to love the person in front of me today?

That simple question changed the way I moved through the world and eventually the way I approached my work. It was not about longer success, responsibilities, and performance because I ultimately report to the Lord.

Instead of asking how my work reflected on me, I began asking how I could honor Him through it.

As I faithfully served where He had placed me, new passions naturally began to emerge.

Like teaching, writing, encouraging widows, and launching young adults into the world.

Once I discovered these gifts and developed an excitement over them, the Lord knew I was ready, and one door after another opened. First, being invited to write for Proverbs 31 Ministries and later being asked to launch A Widows Might. Next, the Lord gently nudged me to move the ministry to its next level, as the launch phase was over, and for me to begin a new focus on math education.

He continues to have me use both my ministry writing and my teaching to further His purpose. I can often recognize someone carrying a heavy burden, and I’m able to use the places the Lord has had me in to help other parents educate and launch their teens.

None of those passions appeared because I went searching for them. They grew while I was simply walking with the Lord in the ordinary places He had already assigned to me.

It’s been years since losing my husband when we were both in our forties. And I want to let you who are early in this walk know: God has you here for a reason. It hurts, and this is rough. But you’re hearing from someone who can honestly tell you there is an abundant life still out there for you.

And it starts here, right now, where God has you.

In your home.

In your neighborhood.

At your job.

At church.

With the family and friends He has already placed around you.

As you walk with Him there, don’t be surprised if one day you look back as I have and realize He was quietly growing new passions in your heart all along.

Simply trust Him where He has you now and trust Him with what’s next.

Father, thank You that I don’t have to figure out my entire future today. Help me to be faithful where You have already placed me. Open my eyes to the people You want me to love and the work You want me to do today. As I walk with You, shape my heart and grow Your purposes within me, one step at a time. Amen.