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Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.
1 Peter 4:8 (ESV)

Do you feel left out on Valentines Day? Ads on TV will lead us to believe the day is all about romance. But did you know the original Valentine wasn’t married? Historians nominate several saints as likely sources for the love notions of Valentines. None of the historic St. Valentines were in a romantic relationship in their own right.

Who were these saints of love?

One was a priest named Valentine who was martyred in 270 AD for his faith by the emperor of Rome, but not before he wrote a letter to his jailor’s daughter. She had befriended him while he was imprisoned. His note to her was signed, “from your Valentine”.

Another was a priest who married couples in secret because the emperor declared that there be no marriages. Rome was at war and unmarried men would be better prepared for battle.

Some believe these accounts might be related to the same St. Valentine. But whether or not these two men are the same, the earnest love shown by each story was defined by kindness and sacrifice, not romance.

In the first story, a priest befriends the daughter of a jailor. No one assumes their relationship was romantic since he was a priest.

It made me think about earnest friendship

Paul commanded in 1 Peter 4:8 (ESV): “Above all, keep loving one another earnestly, since love covers a multitude of sins.” Do you have that type of love in your life?

I have with a missionary in China. Giving this brother-in-faith encouragement and support has been so uplifting for me. Take, for instance, his Christmas email. It said years in a faithless country had taught him that Christmas as a tradition wasn’t as meaningful as knowing God sent baby Jesus in the first place. But this year, he began to enjoy the celebratory day in its own right again. That’s because he felt connected again to the west through our friendship.

That email felt like St. Valentine’s message to the jailor’s daughter. She had brought him encouragement and was rewarded with the first ever Valentine.

Think about it. That day is revered each year as the hallmark of romance. And yet the saint who started it wasn’t in a romantic relationship at all. Shouldn’t that make us think about the true meaning of this holiday?

The true meaning of the holiday

I thought about Valentines I get from others in the form of encouragement

My friend April prays with me earnestly and I with her when we come across challenges with launching millennial kids.

My friend Debbie suffered losses of family members in the past year just as I had. We share and vent, knowing the other will keep private and overlook our complaints while earnestly reminding that Christ remains there for us.

My closest sister continues to hold on to me with earnest love. We grew up believing we would one day be two funny old ladies living together like the Balwin sisters on the Waltons. Years of diverging values and misunderstandings has our sisterly bond tainted, but not broken. Because we both choose to love each other the way Paul commands, we’re able to stay connected, usually lightly, but closely when we need it. That’s love. It forgives all fault and chooses to be open to healing.

All brothers and sisters who choose to do life with me are my Valentines. And if the true Valentine who started it all loved earnestly, as Paul commanded, rather than as portrayed in Hallmark movies, so can I.

The romantic in me, however, still watches the Hallmark Channel!

Father, help the widow know she isn’t alone and that even the saint who started this day was himself, not married to an earthly partner. Fill her with Your love so that she can in turn share love with her brothers and sisters in Christ. Amen