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A heart-to-heart conversation with Jesus

I was headed to a birthday celebration for a wonderful friend, but my mood was unsettled, and my heart was so heavy.

The day was beautiful. The air was spring-like and warm, and the sun felt so wonderful on my face as it shone through the windshield on Steve’s beloved truck.

Having just thawed out from a Texas-style winter blast with ice and snow, I found the warmth a great and much-appreciated gift.

“Why”, I asked myself. “There is absolutely no reason for you to feel this way today!”

Do you battle days like that sometimes?

Because some of my best times of prayer take place driving that truck, I decided to take it to the Lord.

Be honest with the Lord.

Can the Lord handle our honesty? Of course He can. He knows our hearts.

I had plenty of time to talk over many issues I seemed to be having, as the party was almost two hours away. Just a conversation with the Lord and me.

I can see Him sitting in that passenger seat, totally concentrating on what I am saying, not how I am driving.

Lord, Your word says,

“Delight yourself also in the Lord,
And He shall give you the desires of your heart.”
Psalm 37:4 (NKJV)

I am 72 years old, and I don’t believe I know exactly what that means.

“Look it up”, I hear Him say.

And as I drive down that highway, 75 miles per hour, I call out Siri’s name, and she answers me immediately…just like I set her up to do.

“Hey Siri.”

“Hmm?” she says.

“What is the definition of delight? I ask her.

“As a verb, delight means to ‘please someone greatly’, and as a noun, it means: ‘great pleasure.’”

Instantly, I realize that I know exactly what ‘delight’ means, because I have experienced it over and over again with my husband, Steve.

To please someone greatly

This morning, I held a coffee cup I cherish and protect because it is irreplaceable to me. It is an oversized mug that has a picture of two owls sitting side by side, and it says, “Owl love you always.”

A very inexpensive mug, a gift from Steve, which he bought for me one day more than ten years ago. I loved it then; I cherish it now.

And I thought about the definition of that word ‘delight’. To please someone greatly.

Just a sweet, simple act of love pleased me greatly and gave me the greatest pleasure. That sweet expression of love made me want to show my love for him and bring him great pleasure as well.

Then, with the Lord sitting beside me, my heart was moved with the strongest desire to please Him greatly.

How can we please the Lord greatly? Bring Him great pleasure?

When Steve went Home to be with the Lord that day after suffering a massive heart attack at our home, my life, my comfort — my normal changed in a moment.

Immediately, I experienced God’s grace settle over me, protecting my heart in the moment and in the months ahead. It seemed I was only able to act out of habit – one step in front of the other.

Soon, though, I began to desperately seek the Lord, at times only able to call out the name of Jesus. He always heard and always answered.

I learned more and more about the Lord’s kind and compassionate heart.

Where I had trouble reading His Word, I listened to the audio version of the Bible. He spoke to me through music – the beautiful things He surrounded me with – nature and His creation.

Through this season, I have come to know Him better. It is through seeking Him and His kingdom that I have experienced the things He has promised His children…

“But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you.”
Matthew 6:33 (NKJV)

My conversation continued with the Lord.

“These things, Lord, what are these things that will be added unto me?”

“Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat or drink; or about your body, what you will wear. Is not life more than food, and the body more than clothes? Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they?”
Matthew 6:25-26 (NIV)

And in His word, we find the answers to our questions.

Lord, is there an expiration date on Your promises?

Have I believed that when Steve left my side for Heaven, the desires of my heart would expire or no longer be fulfilled?

Or that seeking the Lord and His kingdom first would depend on Steve walking beside me here on this earth?

There are no expiration dates with God. His promises are personal, true, and everlasting.

Now the Lord was gracious to Sarah AS HE HAD SAID, and the Lord did for Sarah WHAT HE HAD PROMISED.
Genesis 21:1 (NIV) (emphasis mine)

It was a wonderful ride in that truck that day. Though I could not physically see the Lord sitting beside me, His presence through His Holy Spirit was evident, and our conversation was real … me speaking out loud, Him answering loud and clear.

It is my desire to please the Lord greatly. To do that, I am going to know Him better, trust Him more, even when I don’t always understand His ways…

And I will trust His promise…

“Delight yourself in Me, and I will give you the desires of your heart.”

With NO EXPIRATION DATE at all!

Oh Father God, thank You that You are with us always, ready to hear and answer every question. You meet our every need in ways only You can. We thank you, Lord God. Amen