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I recently went to the funeral of a friend and neighbor. As I drove home that afternoon, I felt so much sadness for her husband, thinking of the journey that was ahead of him. I also found myself overwhelmed with gratitude as I was able to head home, back to my family. Because I know what it’s like to say goodbye to your soulmate. Everyone leaves that day and returns to their normal lives, while you go back to one you don’t even recognize.

Though I’ve been through the unthinkable, and loss is something I carry with me every day, funerals are still a powerful reminder of how short this life is.

They are also a stark reminder of the extreme pain and sorrow of my own loss, especially those days, weeks, and months after … Those moments I was not sure I would survive.

But through the Lord’s mercy and strength, I did.

If I could tell my 31-year-old self, 11 years ago, anything, it would be this: You will never be the same. You will always miss Michael. But you will learn to live again. When you lean on the Lord, He can redeem anything, and joy can find you once again.

There were many, but these are some of the verses that carried me through those first days, weeks, and months, and they remain some of my favorite Scriptures today.

He prepares a place for us. Nothing catches our Lord by surprise. Though we have free will, He is ultimately in control. This truth brought me immense comfort:

“My Father’s house has many rooms; if that were not so, would I have told you that I am going there to prepare a place for you? And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.”
John 14:2–3 (NIV)

God is with us through it all. Even in the valleys, He never leaves our side:

“The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit.”
Psalm 34:18 (NIV)

Praying and staying close to the Lord is the only way through something of this magnitude. And when we do, the Lord fights for us:

“Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God, so that you can take your stand against the devil’s schemes … Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground.”
Ephesians 6:10–13 (NIV)

Even now, I still have moments where grief catches me off guard. It doesn’t disappear, but it changes. And somehow, alongside the grief, I am still thankful … for the love we experienced, for the time we were given (though not nearly long enough!) and for the faithfulness of God who carried me through what I thought would break me.

Sisters, you may not recognize your life right now, and that’s OK. Healing is not about returning to who we were; it’s about allowing God to meet us in our grief and work in our lives, even when nothing makes sense. Lean into Him. Sometimes all we can do is whisper a prayer, and that is enough. He is near. He is faithful. And in time, He will bring light back into the places that feel impossibly dark.

Lord, we know you are with us through it all. Remind us that this overwhelming darkness will pass if we stay close to you. Bring joy back into our lives, and use us for your good. In Jesus’ name, Amen.