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” …showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel, since they are heirs with you of the grace of life…”
I Peter 3:7 (ESV)

I got up early, showered, straightened my hair, and overall just looked cute. Thinking about corporate worship, I couldn’t wait to be with the Church.

What snow? I’d be just fine.

Opening my garage door, I wasn’t surprised to see several inches of the white stuff and more still falling.

“No problem. I’ve got this.”

I backed out slowly. All was well; there was no getting stuck in this driveway.

Well, until I got stuck, that is.

The wheels spun, and the engine revved. But it was just a show.

Hmm, that was futile.

The first action step– call a friend, of course. A true gentleman, he offered to come to get me. Meekly, I accepted.

In the meantime, I shoveled with determination and perhaps stubbornness.

At least I could get it back in the garage, right?

I’ll spare you all the grizzly details, but I ended up wet, covered in snow, mad, crying, and no closer to getting the car unstuck. The wind was unforgiving, hurling snow at places I’d already cleared. And you can forget that lovely, straightened hair.

Tears stung my face.

I was angry I no longer had a husband to take care of such things. I was angry I couldn’t do it and angry I had to ask for help.

When I called my friend back, I felt like an incapable wimp.

“Don’t come to get me.”

“Why?”

“I’m so angry and upset that I can’t get my car out. I’m mad that I have to, and not at all in the right place to be at church.”

“Ami, you’re being ridiculous. I’m coming to get you,” my guy friend calmly replied.

Later during worship, he slipped me a note. “I need your car keys. Several of us are going to go over and get your car unstuck.”

Tears formed again, yet these were full of gratitude. I’m strong in many ways, but it’s okay to admit my weaknesses.

I am weaker in physical strength than men, but that’s not a bad thing.

So, here are the lessons:

Culture says, “Be a strong, tough, independent woman.” But God honors women as the “weaker vessel.” I don’t mean that women aren’t capable, but our Lord says to be honored, cherished, and protected. Be the fine china. My pastor put it this way, “A chivalrous man takes the bullets, does the nasty work, and gets dirty because he realizes a lady shouldn’t have to.”

“…showing honor to the woman as the weaker vessel.”
I Peter 3:7 (ESV)

“Weaker vessel” doesn’t mean it’s inferior or any less valued. Rather, it is to be protected, esteemed, and highly valued.

That’s a difficult thing for widows to hear. “Who’s protecting me now? Who is doing the nasty work? Quite frankly, I have to do it a lot these days,“ my heart cries.

Yes, that’s often true, but it’s okay to ask for help. Sometimes it’s even needed. I know that’s a challenge, but people may not know the need until we ask. While Peter is speaking specifically to husbands in the verse above, there’s a broader application within the church. Men can still honor the women around them with appropriate boundaries.

Being cared for is a lovely thing. I miss my chivalrous husband dearly, but I’m thankful God still puts chivalrous men in my life- family, friends, and pastors. I’m thankful for men who help with home repairs, lift heavy objects, and pick me up in a blizzard.

I don’t have to be tough.

Father, ultimately You are the One who protects and provides. But it’s difficult to be on my own. Give me the grace to seek help when I need it, and the grace to accept help when I need it. Please provide for my fellow sisters, so that they may be cherished and valued also. Amen.