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Do you identify as a widow?

Widowhood is the journey of life after the loss of a spouse. It’s not a destination, a place to stay and set up camp; rather, it’s about daily living as we move forward. We don’t move on—implying leaving our loved one and our love for them behind—but we move forward, carrying their love and memories with us as we heal and grow through the grief process.

Being a widow describes us, but it does not define us. And it’s so easy to become wrapped up in the identity of being a widow since it affects so many areas of life. However, we are so much more than just widows.

Yes….

I am a widow, “a woman who has lost her spouse through death,” but I am not only a widow. I am also a child of God, a mother, a daughter, a sister, an aunt, a granddaughter, a cousin, a niece, a daughter-in-law, and a friend. I am a follower of Jesus Christ, a business owner, a teacher, a supporter of small businesses and the local economy, a board member, and a volunteer.

Yes….

I am a widow, and my life has been changed forever. Yes, I am a widow, however that is not an all-encompassing identity.

Widow…it is not my identity but it does affect me. It affects me in countless ways. It impacts me daily. Our lives were so intertwined—we ran a business together, we homeschooled together, we ate together, slept together. We did pretty much everything together.

Widow….

It is incredible how those five letters—widow—can turn your world upside down and inside out. However there is something so encouraging about this widow life: the knowledge that God holds a special place in His heart for the widow.

• He promises to protect the widow. Deuteronomy 10:18 (ESV)
• He defends her. Psalms 68:5 (ESV)
• He comforts her. Matthew 5:4 (ESV)
• He draws near to her. Psalms 34:18 (ESV)
• He provides for her. Psalms 146:9 (ESV)

He held me.

The first time I experienced His personal comfort after losing Norm was in a way that surprised me. That first night, I was lying in bed alone, crying my eyes out. I needed the comfort from the very one I was grieving for. I cried out to God, “I just need a hug! God, I need You to hug me. My heart is in a million pieces. I don’t know how to do this and I just need to be held.” And in that moment, He held me—closely, tenderly, and lovingly. God Himself drew near to me and held me.

God is so faithful to fulfill His promises. Although it may not always look the way we hope or come in the form we expect, His word does not come back void. His promises will be kept.

“Father of the fatherless and protector of widows is God in his holy habitation.”
Psalm 68:5 (ESV)

“The Lord tears down the house of the proud but maintains the widow’s boundaries.”
Proverbs 15:25 (ESV)

“When you reap your harvest in your field and forget a sheaf in the field, you shall not go back to get it. It shall be for the sojourner, the fatherless, and the widow, that the Lord your God may bless you in all the work of your hands.”
Proverbs 24:19 (ESV)

Heavenly Father, help us to trust in You and Your promises. Remind us and show us that Your Word does not come back void. You do not make empty promises, You are faithful, and Your Word is true. Thank You that we can lean into You and trust that You will defend, comfort, protect, and provide for us. In Jesus’ name, Amen.