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Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise,
but the companion of fools will suffer harm.
Proverbs 13:20 (ESV)

The scene opens to Brad curled up in bed, eyes wide open.

In this motion picture, “Brad’s Status”, Brad painfully compares himself to buddies from college. He and his family live modest lives dedicated to goodness and decency. He should be happy. But thinking about his jet-setting friends interferes with his contentment.

I have moments like that. I love my walk with God, my friendships and loving bonds with kids and family.

Then… on a dime, I become Brad, awake at night wondering the what-ifs!

What causes contentment to scurry like that in a sudden moment?

It’s all in a quick glance away from God. A look sideways. Many blame social media for tempting us to compare our lives. I wrote about this here.

But I wonder – is envy always to blame? I have plenty of friends with picture-perfect lives who inspire me even if they have what I don’t. These are wise women, filled with the Holy Spirit. Around them, I see life through eyes of wisdom and feel lifted and happy.

Solomon wrote in Proverbs 13:20a (ESV),

“Whoever walks with the wise becomes wise.”

He also wrote,

“the companion of fools will suffer harm.”

When I take my eyes off God and look at lives of those who follow the world, I’m silently agreeing to walk with fools. That’s when discontentment begins.

Fools aren’t always easy to spot. They may be nice people who misunderstand happiness. They flaunt their lifestyles, comfort and status above their walk with God.

I know better than to physically hang with them, but when I compare how my life stacks up to theirs, I choose to become a fool’s companion and suffer harm.

That’s what happens with Brad. He thinks about how his life could have been had he gone the route of friends who live selfishly lavish lives.

He’s aligning his heart, as a companion so-to-say, with these friends–not his wife’s, not his son’s, and certainly not God’s.

Brad finally engages with one of these college friends. That friend says, “how’s that little think you do?” — that little thing being the non-profit organization Brad poured his life into with little pay.

I can relate with one of my “friend’s” patronizing words.

When she visits, I try to feel the same bond with her I feel with my godly friends. I honestly love her. But her way of showcasing her wonderful life just doesn’t inspire me. And, of all things, in nearly every conversation, she asks, “how’s that little ministry you started?”

Just like Brad’s friend!

That six-little-word question frames the entire energy between me and this friend. It’s not a poorly-phrased gaff. It’s a soundbite for all her flouting and worldly “advice”. She sees her life as grand and my life as “little” and can’t understand why years ago I founded this ministry rather than building a profitable career. She can’t see God’s riches pouring out from it!

Sisters, a foolish friend will size-up your walk with God, but His kingdom is bigger than her material world. See her through God’s eyes. Laugh with her. She’ll never stop patronizing until she sees life through God’s eyes.

Your loving response can help that. In the movie, Brad lovingly says to his friend, “I can’t do this conversation, but thank you for your friendship.” Then he smiles and goes about his life.

Put your focus back on your godly friends. Walk with the wise, sisters. Guard your heart, and don’t buy into the world’s lies about your life.

Dear Lord,

There is something about being widowed that exposes the deepest insecurities. Please help these sisters know that they can choose companions that inspire them to walk with You, not the world.