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Today we are joined by Vanessa Yochim. Her story is at the end of the article.

There’s a place in our grief journey between needed, healthy grieving, and being ready to move forward into the new life that lies before us. We most certainly must do the hard work of grieving and healing in order to be ready to move into wholeness once again.

But if we are not careful, we can find ourselves stuck in the dark, lonely place of fear, doubt, and indecision, and unable to move into the new life God has prepared for us.

A dear friend recently challenged me with two questions:

What are you afraid of?

It really made me stop and evaluate my inner fears. Satan can use anything and everything in our lives to create fear and doubt.

God’s word tells me:

“So do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.”
Isaiah 41:10 NIV

So, what am I afraid of?

I am afraid of making decisions. After so many years of relying on my husband’s wisdom as we prayed and made thousands of decisions for our family, I feel lost without his guidance and leadership and am afraid of making wrong decisions

I am afraid of failing. If I make a wrong decision, then I have failed in so many ways. I have failed my children and grandchildren, friends, myself, and Jesus. I don’t want to fail.

I am afraid because I can’t get a clear direction for what God wants me to do, which keeps me paralyzed and unable to make decisions.

I am afraid of being stuck. I don’t like being in this dark place of loneliness and the unknown. I am afraid I don’t know how to get moving into a healing place.

I am afraid of moving forward to places that won’t include my husband. I am afraid of leaving him behind along with precious memories.

Do you trust God to take care of you?

Oh, my. That was a needed dagger right to the core of all my fears. Of course, I trust Him. But wait. Then why am I so afraid?

“When I am afraid, I put my trust in you.”
Psalm 56:3 NIV

Instead of my husband being the spiritual leader of our home, I must go directly to Jesus and grow closer than ever to Him so I can know the right decisions to make. He is the One who will lead me. He is the One Who can quiet my fears and tell me everything will be okay because He’s got this. When I am in God’s word daily, talking and listening to Him in prayer, and leaning on the wisdom of dear, Godly friends, then I won’t fail.

What a relief to know that I don’t have to figure it all out right now, by myself. I just need to ask God for direction for today. Just the next step with Jesus will keep me moving in the right direction, and fear won’t keep me stuck. I can trust Him to help me move forward into His perfect plan for me, and I can bring all our precious memories with me. Thank You, Jesus!

What are you afraid of?

Do you trust God to take care of you?

Father God, thank You for good friends who speak truth into our confusion. Thank You for reminding us that we are not alone, and we can trust You with our fears and doubt. Help us not to stay stuck in our grief and fears, but to let You lead us into something new and glorious. Amen.