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“But we all, with unveiled face, beholding as in a mirror the glory of the Lord, are being formed into the same image from the glory to glory, just as by the Spirit of the Lord.”
2 Corinthians 3:18 NKJV

I caught a glimpse of myself in a mirror the other day.

Not a “hair is fixed, make-up is on, ready to go to work” kind of glimpse. Rather, a deep look at the reflection of the person staring back out at me kind of look.

Perhaps, you know what I am talking about. A deep look into the eyes of one who has seen too much, hurt too deep, cried too many tears, feeling lonely and at times, utterly defeated.

A look into a reflection of someone at times I no longer even recognize.

I often wonder if my husband would recognize the person I have become. My life with him by my side reflected a strong independent will; but, perfectly content to rest in his strength and the assurance of his presence. It was he who took the lead in our home. He tackled the big problems. He had the male chores covered and I gladly let him.

That has all changed now.

No longer do I have him to “man-handle” those male chores. I do not have him as back up to life’s complications. His support in parenting and finances is no longer. I cannot feel his loving arms wrap me in a hug and hear his voice tell me that everything will be okay.

What’s a girl suppose to do with all that?

Is there enough make-up in the world to cover the hurt, worry, fear and loneliness that clouds this reflection I see in the mirror?

Make-up? Perhaps not. But, a transformation covered in Grace? Most definitely!

The choice is mine. I can live under a veil of discouragement and defeat. Or, I can lift the veil of brokenness and be transformed.

“And do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, that you may prove what is that good and acceptable and perfect will of God.
Romans 12:2 NKJV

“Do not be conformed to this world”. What, you might ask, does that look like?

Conforming is attaining an outward expression that does not reflect what is truly inside, a kind of masquerade or act. Sound familiar? In the months after my husband’s move to Heaven, I was the queen of putting on my “game face”. I wanted everyone to see me as strong and confident in Christ, but, inside I was a mess. I wrestled with my beliefs and my values because I allowed this deep grief to question everything I knew about Christ.

Renewing of your mind.

This is the kind of transformation that can come only through the Holy Spirit. The changes arrive from consistent studying and meditation of His words through Scripture. Praying deeply and often. Allowing Him to give way to a renewed mind that is saturated and controlled by the Word of God.

Healing can and will arrive IF I permit God to mend the pieces of my broken and shredded heart. You see, even if my husband would not recognize me, or even as I, myself, struggle with the reflection in the mirror, I know God still recognizes me. He knew I would be on this journey. I must give Him total submission to take this girl I now see in the mirror and change her image as my heart desires to be more Christ-like. After all, the crowning goal of a believer is to become more Christ-like.

I pray as each of us now looks in a mirror, we can hold to this scripture and be transformed, manifested by our inner redeemed nature.

Heavenly Father, As I struggled with the image reflected in a mirror causing many questions to surface, I am so grateful for you revealing this scripture to me. Help us all, Lord, to cling to your Words and grow to be more Christ-like as we move forward. May the change we see become the change we not only see, but the change we feel and live out loud so others see you in us. Amen.