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…..and a time to heal.
Ecclesiastes 3:3 (ESV)

“Linda!!! Come out here!!!”

The tone of urgency in his voice caused me to move quickly outside to where he stood looking at the ground. Then I saw the smile and the twinkle in his eye as he pointed to the tiny green shoots. The daffodils were coming up!

Knowing how much I loved flowers, he had made a special effort the previous fall to plant the bulbs. Persistent back problems made it difficult for him to get on his knees and dig in the dirt. That was one of his many acts of service to me.

We enjoyed those daffodils that spring – and for many springs following. And each year he would be the first one to notice their arrival – until that last spring when he was in the care center. I did make sure there were some in his room and oddly enough (well maybe not!) there were some outside his window. But it just wasn’t the same. I honestly don’t remember if I even noticed them in our yard that year, or the year after. I was lost in the early fog of grief – going through each day – one breath at a time – one foot in front of the other. Every day was winter.

Then came the spring when I longed to see those green shoots breaking through the ground. Winter was long and hard that year; but, each day I would go outside with my camera and look for green. I was not disappointed. In due time they arrived. I reached down and touched those fresh green offerings, remembering the love we shared and the man who planted them. And I smiled.

It has been four springs since he has been gone. I miss our times sitting outside enjoying the daffodils and the other spring flowers; watching the birds busy about nest building in the bird houses; and breathing in the fresh smell of springtime air.

Yet, I have the memories of those times we spent together. The memories come easier now. They slide in quietly and are more likely to cause a smile than a tear.

Yes, he is gone. But love remains and hope stands with it. Healing has broken through much like the new sprouts of daffodils – proof that God is faithful and there is indeed a time for everything under the sun.

To be sure, I still miss my husband. There are still times of tears, and learning to live alone is no easy task. My “winter” of grief has been hard, but God has walked beside me and held my hand throughout. He alone has kept me warm while I have waited for spring to come.

Dear Father, there are so many of my dear sisters who cannot imagine spring ever coming to them again. There are also others who have endured many springs without their beloved alongside. I pray You send hope and healing to them. We hold fast to You today and every day until we see Your face. Amen