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But when the fullness of time had come, God sent forth his Son, born of woman, born under the law, to redeem those who were under the law, so that we might receive adoption as sons.
Galatians 4:4-5 (ESV)

Have you found in grief it is a struggle to focus on just about anything?

Your mind wanders to a place of mush, it seems. Nothing is clear and everything is foggy.

I know that was so true in my own life. And our society has so morphed Jesus’ birth into a materialistic feeding frenzy that it is even hard to distinguish what is going on anymore. When my husband Mark and I were just starting out together, we incorporated his family’s traditions reflecting on Advent the weeks before Christmas. Beautiful traditions of reading Scripture and singing Christmas hymns helped us not only look to the past coming of Christ but also the future coming of Christ. It also allowed us time to reflect on our redemption and adoption into Christ’s family.

My first Christmas came nearly a year after my husband Mark had passed away. I know, for some of you, the holidays hit pretty quickly after your loss.

So I thought of a few things I did to help focus on Christ’s birth even while grieving.

1) Be intentional – I purposely chose the music I listened to and the shows I watched. My family and I do not like Christmas songs about empty chairs or missing loved ones. It makes us sad instead of happy. I made a playlist on my phone of songs that help me focus on God’s gift of the Christ child. I was also purposeful about what we watched. Trendy feel good Christmas movies about love and romance might not be good for the first couple of years.

2) Find community – choose one or two people that you want to build community with during this time of the year. This is not the time to be alone. I went with a couple of friends to a performance of Handel’s Messiah and even took my personal copy along with me to follow along! Yes, I am strange that way! But what a beautiful way for me to again be intentional about the music I listen to and get to know one or two people a little better.

3) Look around – tell someone Merry Christmas and pay for their groceries or their sandwich. Give a smile and a friendly comment to the cashier (and learn his/her name). Remind someone struggling that you are praying for them. Pray for opportunities to share the gospel and the truth of the season. Never underestimate the power of a smile. And it costs nothing.

And my last thought is that if you have not accepted Jesus as your Savior, this is the time to do it.

God sent His Son to earth so He could bridge the gap between heaven and earth – between sinners and the sinless. And He offers the gift of salvation to you today. At the RIGHT time, He came to earth as a baby. And He offers you redemption from your sins. If you have questions about your salvation, please email us. We would love to help you make that decision.

One song my kids and I found a long time ago was a song called “It’s About the Cross” by a group called Go Fish.

It’s about how Jesus came so that we could be born again.

This song plays in my head a lot during the Christmas season. It is just a good reminder of where to keep our focus. In all of the things we do to celebrate, we need to keep our focus on Christ’s birth. He is the One who gives us HOPE.

Lord Jesus, this time of year should be a beautiful reminder of all You did for us because of Your great love. Thank You that You understand our grief and You are walking in it with us. Give us grace for ourselves this year and grace for those around us. Amen