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He was delivered over to death for our sins and was raised to life for our justification.
Romans 4:25 (NIV)

I sit in a doctor’s waiting room again today; walking the cold, sterile halls to an exam room; discussing symptoms and pain issues with a specialist.

This time I am with my daughter instead of my husband, but the memories flood me just the same.

No, she doesn’t have cancer. No, her condition isn’t life threatening. But the hours spent with her through an exam and then in the lab for massive blood draws were all too familiar to me.

She has some type of auto immune disease, one that is hard to pinpoint and diagnose; a chronic illness that doesn’t present with typical symptoms. The fact that her disease is unknown doesn’t eliminate the reality of her joint pain. It doesn’t dismiss that she has sat out of Cross Country and Softball seasons because it hurts too much to do the things she enjoys.

I don’t like seeing my daughter suffer.

No parent likes to see their child suffering.

Ahhhhh, and with that thought, the light bulb blinks on in my heart.

NO PARENT…

God the Father did not enjoy seeing His Son suffering.

In Matthew 26:38-39 Jesus Christ was overwhelmed with sorrow. He asked for God to take the cup of suffering from Him.

Can you even imagine? The all-powerful God, who could end the suffering of His Son, chose not to. I cannot comprehend the restraint that must have taken. What intense heartache.

Jesus finishes His request with these nine words, “Yet not as I will, but as You will.”

Oh how the Father must have been beaming with pride over his Son’s submission; a total submission that led all the way to the cross.

Christ asked again in verse 42, “My Father, if it is not possible for this cup to be taken away unless I drink it, may Your will be done.”

And again, in verse 44 Jesus makes His same request.

This repeated plea for help coupled with unwavering willingness to obey shakes me to my core.

I want to stop the pain my daughter experiences on a daily basis. I cannot.

God’s love for us is so unfathomably great, that He allowed His Son to suffer, knowing it was the only way for us to spend eternity with Him. Even knowing that Christ would be victorious over death, God’s heart must have grieved at His suffering. Jesus’ cup of suffering was the separation from God that would occur when He took on the sins of the world. He faced a double death. I imagine that spiritual separation was even more painful than the physical death for Christ.

Jesus, being God Himself, was given the power to lay down His life. (John 10:17-18) He, as the Son of God, always obeys the will of His Father. He stayed on the cross. He stayed to become our way of salvation.

God didn’t stop Jesus’ suffering.

He is God the Father. He knows what it is like to watch a child suffer and yet His love for us is so vast that He permitted it.

I wouldn’t choose for my child to suffer in order for me to have a relationship with you, sister. I certainly wouldn’t expect you to sacrifice your child in order to know me. Yet that’s exactly what God did for each of us.

He

amazes

me.

Thank You, Lord that You are a loving God. Your love for us transcends our knowledge. Watching my child suffer the slightest bit grieves my heart. I cannot wrap my brain around the depth of Your love for mankind that You would sacrifice Your Son for our redemption, but I am so grateful that You did. You amaze me, Lord. Amen.