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The Lord upholds all who are falling
and raises up all who are bowed down.
Psalm 145:14 ESV

A New Year…What does that mean to you?

For me, it is a blank page, ready to be filled with new friends and new places, new adventures and new books. For me, it is full of HOPE. But it hasn’t always been that way. There were several years in a row that I struggled with feeling like a complete failure.

It was during this time I was given a quote from Max Lucado.

“We so fear failure that we create the image of perfection, lest heaven be even more disappointed in us than we are. The result? The weariest people on earth.” *

I can easily be one of those “weary people”, trying so hard to make my life look good on the outside. Doing all the “right” things. But no more, thank you very much! No more pretty package wrapped up with a bow. I am all out of bows.

I don’t fear failure anymore. I have had it smacked in my face. I had to experience these failings and the grace of God that came because of it.

Today is the anniversary of my late husband’s trip to heaven. I remember that day vividly. I think it only fitting to talk a little about our failures and how God walked with me (upheld me) through them.

We had created a picture-perfect image of ourselves that we knew was false, but we couldn’t let anyone else know it was false. We knew about God’s grace, but we still feared failing each other. Perhaps failing our kids. Or our parents or siblings. We kept up the image that all was good when it was completely falling apart. We were failing at our Christian walk, and we were ministry leaders in our church!

I learned that we need to give ourselves permission to fail. I never felt the freedom before because I had always feared disappointing people. I feared failing.

God provided friendships for me during my darkest times. My friends have seen all kinds of messy over the last few years. It took me a while to find the friends who I could share the mess with, and those particular ones have loved me, held me, and prayed with me. Search and pray for that kind of friend in your life. We can’t do this thing called life without those kinds of people.

Another thing God showed me in my failures was to be accountable to someone. Someone who can be the bad guy when necessary. Who can tell you when you need to do the hard things. When you need to back off. When you need to step away. When you need to step up. When you need to pray together. I believe that God created us for community. Not for isolation.

For a while during the time around my husband’s sudden death, I had a prayer group that met each week. What a blessing to sit with these two ladies and laugh and pray and cry. Some weeks I had to pass on praying aloud because my emotions were so close to the surface. I don’t think anything brings you closer than praying together in complete honesty.

This new year, new page, I encourage you to find someone who can walk life with you. Pray God will direct you to this person. Maybe you need to BE this kind of person for someone else. You may be their answer to prayer.

And last, I wanted to leave you with a little gimmick to help you think about the past year. Adjust as desired…

2020

20    Think of 20 blessings that came your way this past year

20    List 20 people to pray for this coming year – divide them up between a few days so it doesn’t seem like so many if needed.

Twenty seems like a large number but I think once you get started, you will fly through them. Pray over it first and ask God to bring these to mind.

Blessings to you for this new year.

Here’s to a new page…

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*From Max Lucado’s book, Grace: More Than We Deserve, Greater Than We Imagine, Thomas Nelson Publishers, 2014