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As I lift up my eyes to the hills—
where does my help come from?
My help comes from the Lord,
The maker of heaven and earth.
Psalm 121:1-2 (NIV)

It came out of nowhere. A loud pop at the rear of my car and suddenly I was having trouble steering my car. As I maneuvered my car to the side of the road I was thankful no other cars were passing me or traveling behind me. God had kept me safe in a situation that could have been deadly. That was the good news!

After pulling myself together I got out to inspect the damage, fully expecting to see a shredded pile of rubber hanging onto the rim.

What I was about to find would set the stage for something I hadn’t experienced in quite a while.

Upon inspection, my back tire was facing in a direction that no rear tire should be facing. It was beyond repair. That was the bad news.

As I watched the tow truck driver lower my car off the rollback it felt like he was lowering a coffin into the ground and suddenly, out of nowhere, a wave of grief rushed over me. I was losing a piece of my husband all over again. I could still see and feel him sitting in the passenger seat each time I drove it. That car was a part of my life with my husband and now it was gone too. All that was left was the memories…255,000 miles of memories!

I’ve learned that when the waves of grief crash over me the best thing I can do is to ride them out.

So I let the tears flow while pouring my heart out to God, asking Him to guide me through the process of shopping for a new car. I had never bought a car on my own before and the whole process scared me. To make matters worse, we were in the middle of a pandemic lockdown. But I knew where my help came from, and I knew God would be faithful to walk beside me just as He had done the past four years.

The whole process reminded me of several things.

First…

…grief has no finish line. It doesn’t end when the funeral is over or in six months, a year or in my case, four years.

Second…

…grief doesn’t make an appointment. It shows up when we least expect it.

Third…

…grief isn’t confined to the physical loss of a person. It can manifest itself in the loss of anything associated with our spouse…their clothing, a wedding ring, and yes, even a car!

Finally…

…I was reminded of God’s faithfulness from the moment my car fell apart until the day I drove out of the dealership with a “brand new to me” vehicle!

In the middle of a pandemic, dealerships were permitted to open four days after my accident and I was able to deal with the same salesman we had dealt with 12 years ago. God had placed a counsel of good men in my life to give me advice. A mistake in posting the vehicle’s price online resulted in a savings of $1000 to me. The whole process took less than a week!

What seemed like a giant mountain in front of me was made low because the Maker of heaven and earth was watching over me!

Father God, thank You that our help comes from You. You will not let our foot slip. Nor will You slumber or sleep as You watch over us. Be our shade so that the sun nor moon will not harm us. Keep us from all harm, watch over our lives, our coming and going both now and forevermore. Amen